Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Ahhhh...things are settling back to "normal". Peanut was sick last week with a nasty cold/virus that turned into two infected ears and bronchiolitis. We're all set with a nebulizer at home as the doctor is suspicious he may develop asthma. It's very possible he had RSV, so at least the $$$ vaccine kept him out of the hospital. He probably picked the bug up from daycare - a little girl had a snotty nose about 2 weeks ago and I had that bad feeling. Peanut was generous and shared his germies with us. I'm finally feeling human again after a week of sinus pain and clogged ears. Hubby is still getting over bronchitis and we're beginning to think he may need round 3 of antibiotics (he's already had round 1 for a respiratory infection and round 2 for bronchitis). Amazingly, Peanut doesn't mind the nebulizer. It has a binkie attachment that he really likes. It's positioned so while he sucks on the binkie, it blows medicine at his nose. We did have a scary episode of tremors with Albuter0l, so he was put on another med that seems not to have as bad side effects, although he does seem to get hyped up after treatments. One afternoon last week, I was so tired I laid him in the bassinette after a treatment while I tried to doze on the bed. Peanut wiggled and kicked for a good 45 minutes, fell asleep for maybe 30, then was squirming again.

Peanut just amazes me and brings such joy. He's 12 lbs now and into 3 month clothes - not too shabby for a 4-month-old baby that was 6 1/2 weeks preemie. He smiles a lot and is finally learning to entertain himself. Yesterday when I got to daycare, I started talking to him and he ignored me. He was way too interested in the colorful things hanging from the ceiling. When I got up close where he could see me, he broke into a huge, gummy smile. Later, while changing him at home, he got talkative. I started tickling his neck which brought out peals of giggles. When I smooched his cheeks, the giggling continued (a first). So I called Hubby and laid the phone next to Peanut while he cooed and giggled away. It was one of the best moments ever.

Things with Hubby and me haven't been going so smoothly. We're both tired, stressed and have been sick. Last week I stayed home with Peanut, but ended up doing a lot of the baby care even though I felt like utter crap. A couple mornings I asked Hubby to feed or nebulize the baby while I pumped and he started with the attitude about how he was going to be late for work. On a normal day I wouldn't care, but I was sick and with Peanut not going to daycare, he was able to sleep in an extra 30+ minutes each day. Yet sick Mommy still had to get up early to feed, nebulize and pump. A regular work day is me up at 5 in order to pump, shower and dress, feed the baby (and now nebulize, too), pump again, get all our gear/food in order, and maybe walk the dog. Hubby gets up at 6:15-6:30 and basically only gets himself ready...maybe walks the dog. He does take Peanut in to daycare, but that's where I drew the line. I have a 40 minute commute. He works 10 minutes from the house. On days I have to take Peanut to daycare, it adds 30 minutes to my drive.

Hubby also just bought an rc plane which is consuming a lot of time. I wanted to go shopping on Saturday, but slept in after the early morning feed-nebulize-pump seesion, due to the nasty bug. Hubby was out all afternoon doing plane-related stuff, so by the time he got home, I didn't feel up to going out. Sunday afternoon was pretty much dedicated to the plane, and so was last night. Last night Hubby held the baby while I ate dinner (Peanut has radar and always gets needy at dinnertime), then was back at the plane until it was my bedtime and I asked him to come in. We spent no time even hanging out together. I'm trying to be patient and I realize that Hubby's work has gotten more stressful lately and that he needs time to unwind. But so do I. In the evenings I'm too tired to go out and if I stay home, I'll end up holding the baby for 2 or 3 hours while sitting on the couch. Not such a horrible thing, but not exactly Mommy relaxing time either. Tonight I'm going shopping for a baby shower and a bridal shower. I can't wait. Pretty sad.

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