Friday, April 11, 2008

Am I unreasonable in thinking that my 3-yr-old who has only been potty trained a few months isn’t ready to wipe his own butt? He comes home from daycare maybe once or twice a week with soiled undies. Hubby and I assumed he had an occasional accident, although he doesn’t have poop accidents at home.

I was driving home with Peanut one evening and out of the blue he told me his undies had poop in them and he needed clean ones. I asked why the teacher didn’t change his dirty undies. No answer. So I asked which teacher went to the potty with him. The reply: “I go by myself.” Hmmm. One of us usually sits with him when he poops at home. He can go by himself, but requests company (and the door must be shut ALL THE WAY, no noise, and no talking. Until he initiates a conversation, usually in whispers.) We always wipe his butt for him. I’m not sure what kind of mess he would make if left to his own devices. When asked to wipe himself, he refuses and it's not a battle worth fighting.

I brought it up the next day with one of the other teachers since Peanut’s teacher comes in after I drop him off. Apparently she teacher accompanies the kids to the potty in the mornings, but has them go solo in the afternoons. Once the kids are out of diapers, the teachers are limited by law as to how much contact they can have with the kids' private areas, so they are expected to quickly learn to clean themselves and receive little or no help.

When he moves to the next class, he will be expected to go completely by himself. I understand the teacher has a class full of kids to watch, but I also expect her to be observant enough not to let my child sit in soiled underwear all afternoon. Is it so much to ask that they check the kids after they go potty?

Can 3-4 year old kids realistically be expected to thoroughly clean themselves after pottying? Will they wash their hands without reminders and supervision?


Sarah said...

Wow, my five year old didn't start wiping himself reliably until he was almost five. He definitely was not coordinated enough to more than a...hehe...half-assed job prior to then. I'm not sure what happened at daycare before then though. I always assumed they helped him but maybe not...

StaceyG said...

We had a similar problem when Punkin was that age. I think 3 is too young but apparently the teachers really do have to be careful about where they touch. People have been sued for less. I remember being 5 and still needing help.